Judge to a very dangerous criminal, about to be sentenced:
“The Defendant, Your last words!”
“Kiss my arse!”
Outraged, both the judge and the prosecutor jumped up. The defendant:
“Hey, not all at the same time, please!”

Two prostitutes in the Wild West talking:
“Hey, what happened to Mary?”
“Don’t you know? She is dead!”
“What?”
“Gonorrhea!!”
“Ha, I didn’t know you could die of gonorrhea!”
“Well yeah, if you gave it to Big Joe…”